I want to be vulnerable and share a personal journey that I believe many of you can relate to. It’s one I never imagined I’d go through, but it taught me some of the most invaluable lessons in my life.
At one point, I almost completely derailed my marriage. Yes, it was definitely a team effort (just the two of us), but the lessons I learned from that experience have been game-changers for me.
Even though I’ve spent years in self-improvement, psychology, and working on myself, I found myself at a loss when it came to reigniting the connection in my own marriage. It wasn’t until I started studying relationships and digging deep that something clicked for me—actually, multiple light bulbs went off all at once!
I realized that I had been doing so many things wrong. That’s when everything shifted. I want to share with you the three most important changes I made in my marriage that completely transformed our relationship.
1. Empowerment Over Control
This was a big one. I had to stop treating my husband like a child—constantly telling him what to do, what to wear, how to parent, or how to handle work situations. It might seem obvious now, but at the time, I thought if I didn’t tell him what to do, it wouldn’t get done.
What I didn’t realize was that this need for control was KILLING the attraction between us. It wasn’t until I embraced empowerment and gave up control that our relationship began to heal. My husband thrived, and so did our connection.
2. Letting Go of Nagging
I’ll admit, I was a professional nagger—trust me, I could have won awards! But what I didn’t realize was that constant nagging wasn’t getting me anywhere. In fact, it was slowly eroding the intimacy and connection in our relationship.
Once I stopped the nagging and shifted to positive communication, everything changed. Instead of complaining, I focused on being supportive and clear about what I needed. The result? I now get more support from my husband than ever, and I no longer feel like the nagging wife (which, spoiler alert, isn’t sexy at all).
3. Owning My Story
One of the biggest breakthroughs came when I stopped playing the victim. I realized I am 100% responsible for the quality of my life and my relationship. This sense of ownership empowered me to show up authentically in my marriage, no matter what was going on around me.
When you own your story, you stop blaming others and start taking control of your own happiness. This shift allowed me to grow personally and strengthened our marriage in ways I couldn’t have imagined.
These three shifts—along with countless other lessons—completely transformed my relationship. Now, I share what I’ve learned with my amazing clients to help them do the same in their own marriages.
If your relationship feels like a mess right now, I want you to know that it can be incredible again. I see that possibility for you.
Ready to take the next step? Let’s chat!
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I’m rooting for you!
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